You’ve thought about it, and thought about it some more. Divorce seems like the best option to end the struggles between you and your spouse. But can you both move on to start a new chapter in your lives? How do you break the news?
If you know you want a divorce, don’t wait to tell your partner. Don’t put it off until your kids reach a certain age, or a particular life event happens. Instead, be honest and up front. If they find out later that you waited and wanted a divorce all that time, it will heighten feelings of mistrust and betrayal, which can make your divorce more complicated.
Select a Good Time
It’s never a good time to tell your partner that you want a divorce while you’re angry or in the middle of an argument. In that case, wait a few hours or even a day until you both cooled down. Make sure neither of you are upset about another issue, such as a bad day at work or an argument with another family member. Timing plays an important role to how your spouse will react to the news.
Be Calm and Assertive
If you made the decision and it’s a done deal, simply state to your partner that you want a divorce and stick to the facts. If you’re still considering a divorce, it’s okay to tell your partner that too. It’s okay to say “I’ve been thinking about getting a divorce and here’s why.”
Avoid the Blame Game
When letting your partner know that you’re looking into getting a divorce, don’t blame them for what you feel they did or didn’t do that caused the divorce. Even if they ask why, keep your answers short and to the point. You don’t want to give your spouse a laundry list of things you blame them for when it comes to the end of your marriage.
When to Consult an Attorney
The best course of action is to meet with an attorney before you tell your spouse you want a divorce. You want to be aware of all your legal options before you break the news to them. Also, you want to be certain you’re not giving away any information that could compromise your divorce or cause more challenges down the road.
Contact Hackensack family and divorce lawyer Rita T. Jerejian today for a consultation at 201.489.7714.