The holidays are usually a time for family, food, and laughter. However, when you’re in the middle of a divorce, the stress of Thanksgiving and Christmas can hit hard. Here are some ways to cope with your divorce, especially if you have children, and make it through the holiday season.
Understand It’s Okay to Be Emotional
Divorces are emotional and the holidays can be emotional too. Combine the two and you have a recipe for a tearful season. Understand that you’re going to be on a rollercoaster of emotion — and that’s okay. Handle what you can, when you can, and give yourself some leeway. Don’t wince at letting people see you be emotional either. Often, people want to support a person they love who is going through a divorce — give them the opportunity.
Let Yourself Feel Joy
It may feel like there’s not much to celebrate when you’re going through a divorce around the holidays. But don’t be afraid to let yourself feel joy — there will still be things that will make you smile and you don’t have to feel guilty. Take this time to build new traditions with your loved ones that you can celebrate year after year. You don’t have to give up your old traditions, but find ways to include new things to do that help you experience the excitement of the season.
Make Others Your Focus
When your divorce is threatening to swallow you up, it’s easy to focus on what is going wrong and the difficult challenges you’re facing. But the holidays are about giving and there’s never been a better time to make other people the focus of your Thanksgiving and Christmas. This doesn’t mean ignore your own feelings all the time, but why not find some things to do for others to help you spend the time? Volunteer at a soup kitchen or make time for the friend you’ve been putting off because you’ve been busy.
Don’t Buy Your Kids the World
Buying your kids everything they want can easily have the impression that you’re “fixing things” or doing right by them. Don’t fall for this trap — your time means more to your children than material things. Take them to see Christmas lights or spend some time putting the tree up together.
Getting through a divorce during any time of the year is hard, but the holidays can make things seem downright impossible. Get the legal support you need by calling the Law Office of Rita T. Jerejian, LLC today for a consultation at 201.489.7714.